A Lonely Place

Pregnancy is at times a lonely state.  Actually, a lot of the time.  I don't know that anything can really be done to change that.  It's possible I bring it upon myself a majority of the time I start feeling this way.  After all, I am hormonal and as a result also hyper-sensitive.

But then I think not.  Nobody, not even your OB can understand everything your body is going through--the pains, the aches, the worries.  And when you are going through said things it's disappointing when it feels that not even the people closest to you care to understand.  But, it's only stomach acid.  It's a common ailment and yes, it's uncomfortable, but I will surivive it. 

And I struggle to keep my mind from twisting and bending things too distantly from what they actually are.

I'll be the first to admit I can't stand to hear other people moan and groan about their physical ailments (and we all know someone who carries on because medical science will never truly understand or diagnose their real problem and we should be amazed at what they are surviving day to day).  That part I get.  A pregnant woman could whine every day.  Nobody wants to hear that.

But if I am feeling a bit worse than usual I'm going to get mopey and my God, the world in my mind is ending.  And that's where I've been the last couple of days.  It's not a good place.  But, I'm trying to come back.  And I'm trying not to hold a grudge against anyone because I had to live this horrible experience alone;  I went in alone, and I'm coming out alone.  This is just one of the times when it would be nice for someone to offer to care for me. 

Well, Clara is with me, as she has reminded me through all of it with her hiccups and kicks. 

Tomorrow I will conquer the world.